Tuesday, October 22, 2013

She was a strong, independent woman who don't need no man

This whole thing was kind of Apollo's fault. Apollo was joshing around with Eros one day, and he was making fun of Eros' arrows, and Eros just wasn't 'bout it, so he decided to get even with Apollo. He decided that he would use Daphne the virgin to do this. Daphne was daughter to Peneus, who had this river, and she was a nymph, and she was totally attractive and all the men wanted her. Daphne, however, stopped for no man, and she was like, "Lol you guys are like a two and I'm for sure like an eleven." And she moved on with her life. Peneus wanted Daphne to grow up and get married and have lots of sons but Daphne complained so much he just couldn't force it upon her. So anyway, Eros shot Apollo with a golden arrow so he fell madly in love with Daphne, and then he shot Daphne with a led arrow, meaning she could never love Apollo back, not that she was going to anyway. So Apollo went after the girl, and she flipped the lkjadf out and so she started prayin' to her daddy, who turned her into a laurel tree. Apollo was totally bummed about the whole thing so he made a laurel wreath he would always wear on his head. From then on, the tree was sacred to the people, and was a symbol for victory even though the dude totally lost.

Attitudes towards eternal youth? Don't do it. It's not natural, first of all. Second of all, you get to see everyone die even though you live forever. I mean really. Just read Tuck Everlasting. That book explains everything. Third of all, the best part about life is being able to grow old and see your kids grow up and have kids and being able to tell them about how you walked four miles to and from school whether it was rain, wind, or shine. That's the life.

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