Ass and brass don't mix.

So somebody finally came up with the idea to just get it together and out all the stories from the "older heroes" and put it on a thing called the Golden Fleece. It was made from a golden ram, guarded by a dragon, and kept at the far end of the Earth, which is a little queer to me been as the world is round and therefore has no end. Jason was supposed to win this s.o.b and he was helped by like Hercules and stuff. So the heroes that helped him were called the Argonauts because they sailed on Jason's ship the Argo. Clever. Finally these guys land at wherever the far end is, and Princess Madea the sorceress decides to help by taking the dragon up for some 420 shenanigans. They probably didn't say it in these exact words, but we all know Madea and the dragon was all up in it like #420blazeit. Anyway. She and Jason escape with the fleece and flee, only to be pursued by Madea's daddy and his crew. The Argonauts followed the coast-line until they circled back to Europe, and ended up being the first to see all the wonders of the world. But then Jason fucked up and dumped Madea and she was PISSED so she killed they babies. Then she persuaded Jason to fall asleep under his ship and made one of the timbers fall on him and that boy DIED. 

Lemme tell y'all bout love. I got this nephew and he be workin for that alphabet soup in da gobernments. That boy asked me to hide this white family up in my house. Chitlen I love in the ghetto. I wanna know how the I'm suppose to hide five white folks. If the police come ho in this neighborhood they don't even send a white car, they come in a black SUV. And these white folk ain't even a family. They so lazy. The daddy in trouble with the police and he just depressed as hell. He won't get up out the bed so I told him, I told him, "if I gotta come back up these stairs and you still in this bed I'm gonna get completely naked and get up in there and spoon." That's what I told the boy. And his son, that boy told me I look like a bag of skittles so I told him I says "boy if you don't get up outta that bed you gonna TASTE THE RAINBOW." And the daughter, I'm bout to kill her. I just dumped a bucket of water on that child because I knew Jesus The Lord was watching. I just don't know. These white folks are gonna stick out more here than I would at a Republica convention. Bryan lucky I love him. And I'm lucky the gobernment payin me $1000 a week.